Showing all posts in Singles

In Gay Marriage, Singles

How to Support Same-Sex Marriage Without Throwing Single Straight People Under the Bus

Author LynnettePosted on 11 Comments

When it comes to the topic of gay Mormons, I don’t even know how many times I’ve seen some variant of this conversation:

Defender of gay Mormons: “It’s unrealistic and unfair for the church to expect gay Mormons to give up all hope of companionship and remain celibate for their whole lives.”

Defender of the church: “It might be a difficult thing to ask, but it’s doable. Look at all the  single straight people who also have to live the law of chastity!”

Defender of gay Mormons: “Those two situations aren’t at all parallel, because at least straight people have the hope of marriage.” Read More

In Dating, Singles

Being a 30-something Single in the Church: Part VIII, My Experiences with On-line Dating Sites

Author SeraphinePosted on 37 Comments

So, various people have expressed interesting in hearing how my experiences with dating (especially on-line dating sites) have been going. I thought I’d do a quick review of my experiences with the three sites I’ve used, and also talk about how I’ve been approaching the whole on-line dating thing more generally. Read More

In Church Life, Marriage, Singles

My Brief, Hideous Encounter with Mormon Single Life

Author EvePosted on 36 Comments

A couple of months ago I was in the throes of a personal bread-making craze which has since spent itself, partly because the bread I made wasn’t very good. (I really need to get some pointers from those domestic goddesses over at FMH.) One bread-baking afternoon I took my wedding ring off to knead the dough, and I neglected to put it on again before attending a church meeting that evening. Read More

In Personal Narratives, Singles

How Do I Change Who I Am for Myself?

Author SeraphinePosted on 13 Comments

When your life is tightly entwined with the lives of others, you adjust who you are to meet their needs and expectations.  For example, spouses make small, daily adjustments so that they don’t push their partners’ buttons.  Parents postpone their desires in order to tend to those of their children.  When not taken to an extreme, this is a good thing.

The past couple years, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about to what extent we should bend who we are to make our relationships with others work.  While I still have a lot of unanswered questions about the outer limits of sacrifice, I’ve learned to embrace the ways that relationships can refine us and transform us into better versions of ourselves.  But now my life circumstances have changed, and because I want to continue a process of transformation, now I’m wondering: how do I change who I am for myself? Read More

In Church Life, Singles

Being Single and Adult

Author LynnettePosted on 19 Comments

I’ve been a legal adult for more than a decade now. However, as a single woman without children, in a church context I often feel relegated to a kind of pre-adult status. Don’t get me wrong: I’m perfectly willing to concede that there are quite likely unique life lessons and experiences involved in marriage and parenting that can’t be gained elsewhere, and I’m not out to downplay the value of those things. Nonetheless, I’d like to find a way to talk about adulthood which didn’t assume that it necessarily included those elements. Read More