Mormon Titles, Very Slightly Revised

I’ve seen threads on Reddit where people slightly alter movie titles to completely change what the story is about. I thought this might be an entertaining thing to try with some Mormon-related book and movie titles. This post has my attempts. Please add yours in the comments if you are willing.

The Work and the Gory — This series tells a dramatized version of early Mormon history, with special focus on the Danites.

Answers Two Gospel Questions — This is a pamphlet extracted from a lengthy book that answers all the gospel questions.

The Mountain of the Ford — An enthusiastic car collector wills that her collection be turned over to the Church upon her death on the condition that it be used to build a temple.

Dan, His Origin and Destiny — The fifth book in the series The Twelve Tribes of Israel: Their Origin and Destiny

A God Who Seeps — The authors propose that God is a liquid being who is able to fill the universe by seeping into all the cracks.

Under the Banter of Heaven — A disturbed man misinterprets lighthearted comments from heavenly beings as an order to kill his sister-in-law.

iCharly — A young man named Sam falls for a vivacious young woman who has a wildly successful YouTube channel.

The Singles War — Singles ward members are extra desperate to get married when a war breaks out and only single people are drafted.

A Marvelous Dork and a Wonder — A teenager who is a total outcast at her high school is chosen by God to bring forth the Sealed Portion of the Book of Mormon.

The Fist Vision — A young man who is having a difficult time deciding what church to join goes into a grove of trees to pray, and finds himself punched out by a vengeful God who feels like he has clearly already provided plenty of guidance.

Ruth Restored — A rogue Gospel Doctrine teacher makes waves when he tinkers with the Old Testament manual to spend more time discussing women.

How Tare a Possession — The maker of this short movie argues that when all is said and done, the Book of Mormon will turn out to have been a plant by Satan.

In Acred Loneliness — The author outlines a plan Joseph Smith briefly contemplated of having all his wives live on a series of large adjacent farms.

Rough Tone Rolling — A struggling musician who is considering giving up her pursuits is reinvigorated by her calling to be the ward music chair.

The Mir Ace of Forgiveness — A cosmonaut who served five stints on the Mir space station is famous for freely forgiving all who have wronged her

The Holly Temple — This history examines Brigham Young’s ill-advised and short-lived plan to build temples out of plants.

No Mean Knows My History — The book takes a statistical look at the life of Joseph Smith, focusing in particular on how the average of his behavior across time fails to capture the sheer variety of different things he was doing.

The Gold Makers — This is an Ex-Mormon Christian exposé that claims that Mormons are performing alchemy in temples.

Johnny Bingo — A handsome young man gives his eight winning bingo cards to his future father-in-law to get permission to marry the man’s daughter.

The Buckslider — A wealthy young man is consumed with guilt over his habit of bribing people to get what he wants.

The Art Ices of Faith — The author argues that an artist’s faith will inevitably be frozen by their wicked devotion to art.

The DRM — Set around the turn of the millennium, a recently returned missionary struggles to accept the reality that he can no longer get all his music for free from Napster.

God’s Arm — In the Last Days, God decides that he’s no longer going to work through fallible missionaries, and he directly makes bare his holy arm before the nations.

Earl Mormonism and the Magic World View — A sequel to the show My Name Is Earl, this show follows Earl and his brother as they convert to Mormonism and follow Mormon norms in a continuing effort to make sure they’re on karma’s good side.

Omen at Church — A zealous man who suffers from scrupulosity sees every sphere in which women participate at church as a bad omen that indicates that Satan is taking over the church.

The Tower of Godliness — The author argues that a complete understanding of Mormon ordinances and temple worship can be gained from a close reading of King Benjamin’s address.

 

11 comments

  1. 1. You should have made each entry as a comment so we could vote on the best ones (my votes would go to Dan, His Origin and Destiny and The Gold Makers).

    2. You have claimed almost all of the low-hanging fruit, so there isn’t much for the rest of us. But I will contribute as think of them. To start with–

    The Prodigal S.O. — Slacker RM stands up his girlfriend on the evening (actually about the tenth evening) she expected him to propose.

  2. Sunday’s Warrior— a chorus of Sabbath keepers fight for the right to extend four-hour church in the Utah corridor

    Vegans at our Barbecue–plant-based Word of Wisdom vigilantes shut down ward activities involving animals products

    Daughters of Provo–girl band cheerleaders sing and dance their way to Hollywood fame

  3. Church Bell — 3-hour church returns when the SS President fails to do his job and the teacher just keeps droning on.

    Church Bill — A sudden drop in tithing receipts elicits a dramatic response from Salt Lake.

    Church Bull — Never mind. Too easy.

  4. We Thank Thee, O God, for a Profit – Documentary about the development of City Creek Center

  5. Once I Was a Beehive (several months before my 15th birthday) Helen is mad that she can’t attend girls camp any more due to a prior engagement.

  6. “The Day Dawn Is Breaking”: Tense short story about a tough girl’s planned escape from reform school.

    (Did I break the rules by shifting words to alternate meanings, rather than changing the words?)

  7. Thanks, everyone, for your additions. Ardis, it’s totally good to bend the rules. You know me–I’m all about the silliness, regardless of how we get it.

  8. Doctrine and Heffalumps: A paleontologist makes the startling discovery that a curelom skull has been mistakenly put on the skeleton of a cumon after visitors to the Church History Museum begin to tag selfies on Instagram with #CHMHeffalump.

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