The Bloggernacle has always been a competitive place—witness the fiercely contested Niblets—so it’s about time we added some formality to our favorite way of proving we’re better than everyone else: the comments section.
Want to compete, but specialize in a particular style of obnoxious commenting? Never fear; with multiple events, the Comment Olympics offer a way for everyone to win gold! You can try:
- Wrestling with your trials (which are so much larger than everyone else’s)
- Shooting down others’ attempts to talk about their problems
- Boxing someone else into a corner
- Sailing through conversations without really listening
- Cycling through the same old arguments again
- Swimming in your tears over other people’s unrighteous choices
- Skating on thin ice of people’s limited tolerance
- Curling your lip in disdain, then rapidly trying to turn it into a fake-nice smile
- Mental gymnastics
- And, of course, the passive-aggressive triathlon: sulk, blame, run.
Start training today!
What about pompous pontificating prolonged production of paragraphs?(PP for short)
– Sailing through conversations without really listening
Dude, just give me the gold.
-Cycling through the same old arguments again
Check out the disaffected groups for contenders here, also!
MDearest,
A little bitter from last week? I would have hoped the holiday weekend would have cheered you up!
Oh well, if you need a pious sermon or someone to pompously pontificate, just let me know! Always happy to oblige.
🙂 PP
Petra,
Perhaps the “People’s Prize” for posts that produce profuse perseveration in the praiseworthy populace?
Please? Pretty please?
PP
I love this list, Petra! A couple of suggested additions:
Long jumping to conclusions
Vaulting into the middle of a conversation
If you write a post like this, do you even have a testimony?
Jesus said that the spirit of contention is of the devil. So, we know where this post is coming from.
No energy to spare for bitterness. Humor exorcises that. It was just my way of pointing out a type of comment common in the bloggernacle not mentioned in the OP list: the multi-paragraph, unedited, unpruned, unabridged, unruly, tl;dr kind.
FENCING off your posts from the same sort of criticism that your posts are directing at Church leaders.
Niklas, I have met the devil. And Petra, as much as it pains me to say it, is no devil.
Wait. I have competition for swimming in my tears? I thought I owned that. I feel so hurt, so sorrowful over this unrighteous competition. . . I don’t know what else to say, but it pains me deeply.