The Commenting Olympics

The Bloggernacle has always been a competitive place—witness the fiercely contested Niblets—so it’s about time we added some formality to our favorite way of proving we’re better than everyone else: the comments section.

Want to compete, but specialize in a particular style of obnoxious commenting? Never fear; with multiple events, the Comment Olympics offer a way for everyone to win gold! You can try:

  • Wrestling with your trials (which are so much larger than everyone else’s)
  • Shooting down others’ attempts to talk about their problems
  • Boxing someone else into a corner
  • Sailing through conversations without really listening
  • Cycling through the same old arguments again
  • Swimming in your tears over other people’s unrighteous choices
  • Skating on thin ice of people’s limited tolerance
  • Curling your lip in disdain, then rapidly trying to turn it into a fake-nice smile
  • Mental gymnastics
  • And, of course, the passive-aggressive triathlon: sulk, blame, run.

Start training today!

10 thoughts on “The Commenting Olympics

  1. 1
  2. 2

    – Sailing through conversations without really listening

    Dude, just give me the gold.

    -Cycling through the same old arguments again

    Check out the disaffected groups for contenders here, also!

  3. 3


    A little bitter from last week? I would have hoped the holiday weekend would have cheered you up!

    Oh well, if you need a pious sermon or someone to pompously pontificate, just let me know! Always happy to oblige.

    🙂 PP

  4. 4


    Perhaps the “People’s Prize” for posts that produce profuse perseveration in the praiseworthy populace?

    Please? Pretty please?


  5. 5

    I love this list, Petra! A couple of suggested additions:

    Long jumping to conclusions
    Vaulting into the middle of a conversation

  6. 6

    If you write a post like this, do you even have a testimony?
    Jesus said that the spirit of contention is of the devil. So, we know where this post is coming from.

  7. 7

    No energy to spare for bitterness. Humor exorcises that. It was just my way of pointing out a type of comment common in the bloggernacle not mentioned in the OP list: the multi-paragraph, unedited, unpruned, unabridged, unruly, tl;dr kind.

  8. 8

    FENCING off your posts from the same sort of criticism that your posts are directing at Church leaders.

  9. 9

    Niklas, I have met the devil. And Petra, as much as it pains me to say it, is no devil.

  10. 10

    Wait. I have competition for swimming in my tears? I thought I owned that. I feel so hurt, so sorrowful over this unrighteous competition. . . I don’t know what else to say, but it pains me deeply.

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