Comments on: Being a 30-something Single in the Church: Part VIII, My Experiences with On-line Dating Sites

By: Zelophehad’s Daughters | An Update

Zelophehad’s Daughters | An Update — Mon, 30 May 2011 04:23:41 +0000

[...] those of you who followed my posts from last spring/summer know, I was doing the whole on-line dating thing. My fiance (who will hereafter be known as J) and I met through match.com. He e-mailed me, and at [...]

By: James

James — Sat, 18 Sep 2010 18:54:59 +0000

The key on first dates (I think anyway) is that they are already out with you so just try to be yourself. They agreed to go out with you in the first place so the groundwork is set.

For the record, I am 34 not Mormon and Scottish. I just spent a whole wedding with a smile on my face but feeling incredibly single for the duration.

All I can say is – do not lose heart but let life come to you. God has a plan!

By: Michelle Glauser

Michelle Glauser — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 13:44:33 +0000

Maybe you should try alikewise.com, a site that matches people according to their book tastes. Awesome.

Or, having lived in Germany for several years, there is a Mormon version of Facebook for German speakers that was really awesome. Of course you still get the different levels of Mormonism and liberalism and everything, but you at least have that basic level of understanding to start at. Check it out if you want to sift through some German. Jaes.ch

And, or course, there’s that new site that’s trying to become the world-wide Mormon facebook. 101saints.com

By: Seraphine

Seraphine — Mon, 02 Aug 2010 04:39:26 +0000

stacer, I think that location can affect one’s experience, so it sounds like it might be worth giving it another shot. I can definitely understand (given your past experiences), though, why it might be a hard leap of faith to take.

and janeannechovy, that’s a great story.

By: stacer

stacer — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 01:24:14 +0000

And I forgot to add: But now that I’m in a new city, on the East Coast, I keep thinking that maybe it’s time to think about online dating again. Perhaps it was more a function of location (too few men with whom I had anything in common professionally or in political outlook?) than anything wrong with me.

By: stacer

stacer — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 01:21:53 +0000

This is interesting to see your experience. I haven’t bothered with dating sites in several years, because no matter what happens, I tend to either get weirdos (and not MY kind of weirdo, which would be fine) or no response at all.

No matter how well online conversations go, if we get as far as meeting in person, they disappear soon after. Usually the fact that I agreed to meet them is just a sign of how little I get out, I’m sure, because I know for a fact my 2 dates last year were from guys who I should have filtered out from sheer non-interest long before meeting in person.

Every now and then, especially when I’m feeling down about yet another year going by with maybe one date, and a bad one at that–if anything–I’ll look at online dating. But it feels like a vicious cycle, and that I’d just end up annoyed and/or disappointed. I’d rather meet someone in person and have a friendship grow over time (but look where that’s got me so far).

By: janeannechovy

janeannechovy — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 07:37:50 +0000

I got married before the advent of online dating sites, but when I was single and spending a summer in Salt Lake, I put an ad in the Tribune. The setup was that it was free to place the ad, but respondents had to use a 1-900 number. I put what I thought were code words in my ad to act as a filter, but apparently to a large number of SL skeezy divorces, “liberal-minded” meant I was likely to put out, not that I was looking for a Sunstone type, and “graduate student” meant I would like guys with associates’ degrees.

After getting a few voice mails from completely inappropriate types who wanted to take me to Lagoon, etc., I changed my outgoing voicemail to a list of about 20 names, and said that if a guy didn’t recognize about 75% of them, he really shouldn’t bother leaving a message. After that the only message I got was from somebody I knew from home, who didn’t realize he was responding to *me*. We went out a couple of times, but the timing was off. He ended up placing his own ad after I went back to school, and meeting someone he later married.

By: Sterling Fluharty

Sterling Fluharty — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 00:08:51 +0000

Heads up: Today starts ten days of free communication at eHarmony. I have never seen the free period last that long, so it might attract a fair number of new users.

By: amelia

amelia — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 20:15:36 +0000

my personal experience with ldssingles was nothing but bad. Mostly because about 90% of the profiles were blank (at least that’s what it felt like). Like the people who made the accounts wanted to see who was there but didn’t want the stigma of dating online to attach to them. I had no success whatsoever there. Maybe it was because I was outside the intermountain west, but there are quite a few Mormons in SoCal. Maybe it was because it was several years ago and now it would be better. I don’t honestly know. But I had a bad enough experience that I’m not really willing to give it another try.

By: queuno

queuno — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 19:04:50 +0000

My sister used ldssingles.com (actually, her best friend put up the profile for her). It worked — she married a guy she met and they are happy, but there were a lot of jerks and she had to put some tough rules about meeting, etc. (I.e., always met at first at a neutral location, drove their own cars, etc.).

My sister said that the LDS site worked better than the eHarmonies of the world because at least she could drill down by religion a bit more quickly.