Please answer gender-appropriately, as I’m curious if men and women feel differently about this. Also, if you’re single feel free to answer hypothetically.
This came to mind because of discussion on Kristine’s BCC thread that many women are grateful that they can’t be bishop, etc. (Of course, this is not a new discussion.) Starfoxy made a great comment (#50) reminding people that time-consuming callings take a toll on both spouses, regardless of which one is called.
This issue came up fairly recently in my marriage. One of the counselors in the bishopric met with me and asked if I would accept a calling as a primary worker. He said they wanted my husband (who was already a primary worker) and I to team-teach the 8yo primary class, and they wanted to call my husband as the cub scout leader for the 8yo boys. Just the week before he had gotten called as the secretary in the stake YM presidency. I agreed, but I suggested to the bishopric member that it might be nice if they gave me callings instead of my husband because I could use more time away from our two small children, and he could use more time home with them. I left it at that (something for future thought), but this wonderful bishopric member repeated my comment to the primary president. She’s also great, just very new to her calling, and she asked, “Could we do that? Can she be the cub scout leader?” He told her that would be fine, and they talked to my husband and I again after church about us still team-teaching in primary and me being the cub scout leader. We both agreed. While I don’t particularly enjoy being a cub scout leader, and it’s certainly not a calling I would ever aspire to (much like that of bishop), I still find it infinitely preferable to my husband being cub scout leader and me having yet one more night home alone with my children.
- 22 January 2008